I can't change who I am-but should we discuss it?

I am somewhat reticent concerning my familial matters when it comes to those outside the trust tree, as it were. So I am therefore hesitant to attend my ten year reunion which is taking place homecoming weekend. I live in the same town with many friends from HS, and abstain from furthering relationships with these individuals, as the differences in our lifestyles have become so great. It was the fourth child. Then the homeschool. No one can relate in that set. The nodding of the head when I answer 'Are you finished having children?' with 'No, not at all' coupled with the glazed look, then disgust when I follow up with 'No he isn't in kindergarten, he's homeschooled.' can be too much at times. And going, I feel would be subjecting myself to this deluge without a friendly or sympathetic face in sight. Unless Jason goes too, but really what fun would he have? We are talking small town kids here and these people are only biding their time until its late enough to get plastered-God love em. I sound a bit negative, however I will say that individually I love, or at least really like, these HS friends, and can dialogue about my life easily one on one. I just think I would freeze or worse-if my lifestyle became in any way a focus for discussion. I wonder if gay people have an easier time coming out. That is what I will be doing, if I go. I will come out as a mother of a large family, homeschooler, and Mormon to boot-they all know that but the reminder will add to my kookiness I'm sure. So I guess what I am saying, is that I am not sure I am ready to come out. But then again I am not ashamed. So where does that leave me. Comments appreciated.

This month is such a special one, its...time to learn how to program Jason's phone

My husband has a Blackberry. Purchased because for his line of work, you just cannot carry around a planner- job sites and what-not. It was a necessity. He would have his schedule, phone, Internet---all right there. Had to have it. So now this is a man who has projects scheduled weeks in advance-he's the annoying guy that calls to remind you a few days before, and then again when he is on the way to make sure its all going according to the plans. This is the man who forgot my birthday. He got a phone call from his mother-I will let you read between the lines and try not to go off on the fact that for her to let her son fail is beyond her capacity and as you can see I have some really deep issues about the whole thing-see I said I wouldn't digress so back on task---reminding him that is was my birthday today and that he shouldn't forget. Too late, Gloria. He forgot. I knew, he knew. He had the decency to at least tell me that she had to remind him, when he called late this morning. I could go on but really why. After six years of marriage, Jason forgot my birthday. Not just today (obviously I will go on), but completely. There is no card or present. Just an apology and a resolve to do better. Oh, and him asking me what I want for my birthday. Right. That says it all.
*But I am not mad, not even hurt. He asked me last week if Reno's birthday was coming up so that tells me two things: One- he was thinking at least that something was going on soon, so I will give him two points for that. Two- Reno's birthday, November 21st, is Jason's birthday as well,so if you could in a round about way forget your own birthday, then I had no hope from the start. Really, I knew he was going to forget so instead of being mad, I just think what a good wife I am for never forgetting his birthday, Father's Day, etc.

Proof that I have a heart

My friend Tess had her first child on Tuesday. She was at church today, a mere five days after delivery, and I asked her how Laevry was doing at night. She then told me not good, and spoke about each night, as there have only been a few at home. It was very sweet and I started thinking about how when you first have a baby, each day is such an event. You mark time by diapers and feedings. Each night is its own entity. You compare how he did tonight with last night. Slept more, slept less, pooped at 2 am, didn't poop until morning. Then in RS when I asked if there was anyone who had had an uplifting experience this week, she naturally raised her hand and spoke of the fact that you cannot have a baby without acknowledging that there is a God. She spoke of the miracle that her baby is and what ready-made love she has for her. It was really awesome to see a new mother go through that revelation that can come only after you have your baby. And I was grateful to be able to remember exactly what she was talking about since Levis only 3 months old. And here is my epiphany: whether its your first or your fourth, its still miraculous and such powerful thing. I was very callous all through my pregnancy about how its my fourth and no big deal. I am pleasantly surprised that it is a big deal. A major deal. Still. And I am grateful for it all.
*This will be the only post of its kind as I am generally void of such inclinations to voice tenderness and love. This blog is not meant to be sappy. I was just touched today. I promise, it won't happen again.

James Brown is the only soul man I know

For those who are waiting to find out if Jason grew a soul patch in an effort to endear himself to me ... ... ... he did not. I asked him moments ago what happened to his promise. Blank stare. Finally, "I forgot." There you have it.

Welcome to the Schroeder's (clothing optional)

A naked story
Once there was a couple doing their finances in the living room while checking out the window on their oldest three children who were playing with the hose on the trampoline. In their underwear. All is well, as it is summertime in Texas and skivvies are the attire of most people on most days. Or maybe that's just us. Like I said, all was well. Then the mother noticed the plumbers had arrived to fix the toilet that had backed up into the tub, unexpectedly- the tub toys could not be salvaged, thanks for checking. She cringed as she remembered the cabinets that her husband had ripped off the laundry room wall the day before, also unexpectedly, were laying in ruins in the grass next to the front steps. And also the camping gear from last week's trip was stacked haphazardly on the picnic table. She felt a bit like those people who live with filth all around them, you know the ones whose homes actually look like they are abandoned and then you see the owners still in their nightclothes and wonder what they think as they walk past that stuff every day for years and years-I digress-- and was hesitant to actually face the plumbers. Then she opened the door. Oh good. Effie and Ava were already on the front porch to greet them. Nakedly. Jimas and all. Then the mother felt a bit worse than those people she was thinking about only moments before, because at least they all had their clothes on. The end.

Actually there is no end to this story, because tomorrow it will be the mail lady, or the UPS man. And now that I recollect, the Schwann's guy has seen them all in various states of undress. There is something to be said for parents who can keep clothing on their children.

We can't get no satisfaction

Reno, who has been in bed for over an hour, just told Jason that the reason he needed another snack was that he had been fasting all day. Not so much little man. But do you think there are people out there who want their kids to fast? I sure hope not. Another question. Does fasting still count when it is followed by gluttony? And really, how many Oreos are too many? Perhaps just leave your answers to yourself. Thanks.